We are about to starve to death here.

We have tried a couple of recipes the past two nights and both of them were flops.

One was a crawfish terrine from Emeril Lagasse that was too bland to bother with. That's what playing to a national audience gets ya.

The other was a Brazilian black-eyed pea fritter with a sauce. The recipe called for "dende oil" which research shows is a distinctly flavored palm oil used in Brazil and Africa.

"Lyman, sweetie boy, maybe we shouldn't try this. It can't come out right."

You don't pop around to the corner grocery for dende oil in Vidalia, LA.

"We'll make do."

Lyman shops, out comes the food processor, and we make a fritter substance with peas, onions, cilantro, and other goodies that tastes pretty good from the container.

The Waring Pro deep-fryer (highly recommended) comes out, we drop the fritters into the hot oil, and they disappear.

I don't know if they were good or bad. They dissolved, nada, nothing left in the basket.

We tried coating a fritter with a little flour. We turned out with a brown flour shell that crumbled in the hand.

I'm thinking Sonic tonight.